Jack in the Giants' Newground!
 
Part IV. 

"Oh, no, Jack. I need that crowbar. Pray don't pitch it over n Virginia." 

"Well, now," says Jack, "I can't be bothered with pitchin' it back there just to where you are. If I can't pitch it where I want, I'll not pitch it at all." 

"Leave it layin' then, Jack. Come on let's go back to the house. You turn loose of my crowbar now." They got back, the giant went in and told his old woman he couldn't find out nothin' about Jack. Said for her to test him awhile herself. Says, "I'll go after firewood. You see can't you get him in the oven against I get back, so's we can eat." 

Went on out, says to Jack, "I got to go get a turn of wood, Jack. You can go on in the house and get ready for supper." 

Jack went on in, looked around, didn't see a thing cookie', and there set a big old-fashioned clay oven with red-hot coals all across it, and the lid layin' to one side. 

The old giant lady came at him, had a wash rag in one hand and a comb in the other'n, says, "Come here now, Jacky. Let me wash ye and comb ye for supper." 

"You're no need to bother," says Jack. "I can wash." 

"Aw, Jack. I anus did wash my own boys before supper. I just want to treat ye like one of my boys." 

"Thank ye, m'am, but I gen'ally wash and comb myself." 

"Aw, please, Jack. You let me wash ye a little now, and comb your head. Come on, Jacky, set up here on this shelf so's I won't have to stoop over." 

Jack looked and saw that shelf was right on one side of the big dirt oven. He cloomb on up on the scaffle, rockled and reeled this-a-way and that-a-way. The old woman kept tryin' to get at him with the rag and comb, but Jack kept on teeterin' around till he slipped off on the wrong side. He cloomb back up and he'd rockle and reel some more. The old woman told him, says, "Sit straight now, Jack. Lean over this way a little. Sakes alive! Don't ye know how to sit up on a shelf?" 

"I never tried sittin' on such a board before," says Jack. "I don't know how you mean." 

"You get down from there a minute. I reckon I'll have to show ye." She started to climb up there on the scaffle, says, "You put your shoulder under it, Jack. I'm mighty heavy and I'm liable to break it down." 

Jack put his shoulder under the far end, and when the old woman went to turn around and sit, Jack shoved up right quick, fetched her span" in the oven. Grabbed him up a hand-spike and prized the lid on. Then he went and hid behind the door. 

Old giant came in directly. Heard somethin' in the oven just a-crackin' and a-poppin'. 

"Old woman! Hey, old woman! Jack's a-burnin'." When she didn't answer, the old giant fin'ly lifted the lid off and there was his old lady just about baked done, says, "Well, I'll be confounded! That's not Jack!" 

Jack stepped out from behind the door, says, "No, hit sure ain't. And you better mind out or I'll put you in there too." 

"Oh, pray, Jack, don't put me in there. You got us licked, Jack. I'm the only one left now, and I reckon I better just leave this country for good. Now, you help me get out of here, Jack, and I'll go off to some other place and I'll promise not to never come back here no more." 

"I'd sure like to help ye, daddy, but I don't think we got time now. Hit's too late." 

"Too late? Why, how come, Jack?" 

"The King sent men down here to kill ye this very day. They ought to be here any minute now." 

"Two thousand! That many will kill me sure. Law, what'll I do? Pray, Jack, hide me somewhere." 

Jack saw a big chest there in the house, told the old giant to jump in that. Time he got in it and Jack fastened the lid down on him, Tack ran to the window and made-out like that army was a-comin' down the holler, says, "Yonder they come, daddy. Looks to me like about three thousand. I'll try to keep 'em off, though. You keep right still now and I'll do my best not to let 'em get ye." 

Jack ran outside the house and commenced makin' a terrible racket, bangin' a stick on the walls, rattlin' the windows, shoutin' and a-hollerin', a-makin'-out like he was a whole army. Fin'ly, he ran back in the house, knocked over the table and two or three chairs, says, "You quit that now and get on out of here! I done killed that old giant! No use in you a-breakin' up them chairs. He ain't here I tell ye!" 

Then Jack 'uld tumble over some more chairs and throw the dishes around considerable, says, "You all leave them things alone now, 'fore I have to knock some of ye down." 

Then he'd run by that chest and beat on it, says, "He ain't in there. You all leave that chest alone. He's dead just like I told ye. Now you men march right on back to the King and tell him I done got shet of them giants and there ain't ary one left." 

Well, Jack fin'ly made like he'd done run the army off. Let the old giant out the chest. He was just a-shakin', says, "Jack, I sure do thank ye for not lettin' all them men find out where I was at." 

So Jack took the old giant on down to the depot, put him on a freight train, and they hauled him off to China. 

The King paid Jack two thousand dollars for bakin' the old giant lady, but he said he couldn't allow him nothin' on the old giant because the trade they'd made was that Jack had to bring in the heads. 

Jack didn't care none about that, 'cause his overhall pockets were just a-bulgin' with money when he got back home. He didn't have to clear that newground for the King, neither. He paid his two brothers, Will and Tom, to do it for him. And the last time I went down to see Jack he was a-coin' real well. 
 


The Jack Tales, by Richard Chase. Copyright 1971.