"CASANOVA DOES CALIFORNIA"

 

                 an original screenplay

                           by

                     Charles Deemer

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

                                          3550 SW Pomona St.

                                          Portland, OR 97219

                                          503-452-8277

                                          cdeemer@yahoo.com

 

                                         

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

FADE IN:

 

 

SUPER

 

"Venice, Italy. Summer, 1749."

 

 

EXT. VENICE - COUNTRY VILLA - NIGHT

 

A second-story window is lit by a lantern. Below, hidden

behind trees, wait three men: these are LORENZO LEBANO,

whose home it is, and two of his workers, VENNY and GIOVANNI.

 

Two figures become a silhouette at the window, a MAN and

WOMAN in a passionate embrace. Lorenzo hisses the name of

his daughter.

 

                      LORENZO

           Rosabel!

 

Venny and Giovanni comfort him.

 

                      GIOVANNI

           He will pay for this.

 

The window opens and the man climbs out and grabs the branch

of an adjacent tree. This is Giacomo Girolamo CASANOVA, 20s,

handsome, athletic, dashing. He wears the frills of an 18th

century gentleman.

 

From the window ROSABEL, a teenager, blows him a kiss and

disappears. Below, Lorenzo makes a soft sound of anguish.

Giovanni and Venny sneak forward to do their work.

 

Casanova shimmies down the tree. Giovanni and Venny are

waiting for him. They grab him, and Casanova struggles.

 

Rosabel comes again to the window and sees what is happening.

 

                      ROSABEL

           Casanova!

 

Her father steps forward to shout up at her, shaking his fist.

 

                      LORENZO

           How ashamed your mother would be of

           you!

 

Giovanni and Venny have Casanova under control. They gag and

bind him, then drag him off to follow Lorenzo.


                                                            2.

 

 

                      ROSABEL

           Father, let him go, I love him!

           Casanova, I love you!

 

 

INT. COUNTRY VILLA - SHED - NIGHT

 

A lantern casts eerie shadows in a workshed. Casanova sits

in a chair, still bound and gagged.

 

Lorenzo takes a vial from a shelf and shakes it. He glares

at Casanova.

 

                      LORENZO

           You have a reputation for performing

           great feats of magic. Now we'll see

           how well you take your own medicine.

                (to the workers)

           Remove the gag.

 

Giovanni removes the gag. Casanova quickly pleads.

 

                      CASANOVA

           I am willing to marry your daughter.

 

                      LORENZO

           How dare you make such a suggestion!

           You, the son of actors! You are scum!

                (to the workers)

           Hold his nose and open his mouth.

 

They do so, and Lorenzo forces Casanova to drink the liquid

in the vial.

 

Casanova coughs, clears his throat.

 

                      LORENZO

           In the nether world, you won't be

           such a lover.

 

                      CASANOVA

           My reputation is greatly exaggerated.

           If you'd let me explain--

 

Lorenzo steps forward and strikes Casanova, knocking him cold.

 

                      LORENZO

           Farewell, Giacomo Casanova. May God

           have mercy on your soul.

                (to the others)

           Get him out of here.


                                                            3.

 

 

SUPER

 

"Venice, California. Summer, the Present."

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Ocean Front Walk on a weekend.

 

A Promenade is lined with palm trees and stretches along the

sand for miles. Elbow-to-elbow PEDESTRIANS wearing California

casual move through a carnival-like atmosphere.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - BEACH - DAY

 

Casanova, wearing the same 18th century frills of a

gentleman, lies on the sand. He appears to be asleep -- or

worse.

 

BIKINI-CLAD MEN AND WOMEN pass by,   giving him hardly a

notice. On this beach, in this town, at this time, the sight

of a strangely-dressed man passed out on the sand is no

cause for alarm.

 

Casanova stirs. He opens his eyes. He manages to sit up. He

looks around.

 

Shock. He blinks and looks around again. He might as well be

on another planet -- in a way he is! -- for all the sense he

can make of what he sees.

 

Nearly naked men and women continue to pass by him. They

smile, they chat -- but to Casanova, they are aliens. It's

as if he is being assaulted by bare navels, exposed breasts,

tight buttocks.

 

 

INT. VENICE, ITALY - COUNTRY VILLA - NIGHT - (MEMORY FLASH)

 

As Casanova crawls in the bedroom window, Rosabel starts

unlacing the front of her dress.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Stop it, Rosabel. You deny me the

           pleasure of doing it myself.

 

                      ROSABEL

           But there's so little time!

 

                      CASANOVA

           A woman's greatest attraction is her

           modesty. The journey must be as

           pleasurable as the destination.


                                                            4.

 

 

EXT. VENICE, CALIF. - BEACH - DAY (PRESENT)

 

Two especially lovely YOUNG WOMEN pass by, their bikinis

revealing everything. Casanova still sits on the sand,

stunned by his surroundings.

 

                      FIRST YOUNG WOMAN

           Hey, dude, nice rags!

 

                      SECOND YOUNG WOMAN

           Cool, Casanova!

 

The sound of his name floors him. His eyes dart around in

confusion.

 

He sees the Promenade along the beach and heads for it.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - SIDE STREET - DAY

 

A van pulls over to drop passengers off. On the side of the

van is written "Los Angeles County. Department of Mental

Health."

 

Getting out is DR. HENNY THOMAS, 30s, and four PATIENTS.

Before closing the door, Henny talks to the driver.

 

                      HENNY

           Pick us up here in two hours.

 

She gathers up the patients and gets them walking in a group

toward the Promenade ahead.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Casanova hurries along the busy Promenade, oblivious to the

sauntering, sweating mass of humanity surrounding him:

pedestrians, bicyclists, skateboarders, roller bladers. He

slices through the weekend crowd like a man who is lost and

confused.

 

Someone hands him a flier. It reads: "Discover the Goddess

Energy! Classes start soon!"

 

He passes an area of beach full of weight lifters; another

where people play table tennis.

 

Along the Promenade, vendors sell T-shirts and hot dogs, sun

glasses and tarot cards.

 

There are street musicians and sidewalk preachers, portrait

artists and jugglers.


                                                            5.

 

 

Casanova continues moving, a man desperate to get anywhere

but here.

 

Another flier is shoved at him. "Unhappy Sex Life? HOLISTIC

ORGASMS RELEASE THE UNIVERSAL EROS!!"

 

A little farther along, Casanova passes a MOTHER who is

helping her BOY, who has a nose bleed. She has a handkerchief

at his nose.

 

                      MOTHER

           Tilt your head back.

 

Casanova stares at the boy.

 

 

INT. VENICE, ITALY - ROOM - DAY (MEMORY FLASH)

 

YOUNG CASANOVA's head is tilted back, just like the boy's.

His MOTHER holds a cloth to his nose.

 

                      CASANOVA'S MOTHER

           Giacomo, you are such a sickly boy.

           Every day your nose bleeds. What am I

           going to do with you?

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY - LATER (PRESENT)

 

Henny leads her patients down the Promenade. Coming in the

other direction is Casanova.

 

A TEENAGED BOY on a skateboard grabs Henny's purse as he

zooms by.

 

                      HENNY

           Hey! Thief, thief!

 

The teenager practically runs over Casanova as he passes.

Henny is pointing at the fleeing kid and yelling.

 

Casanova reacts quickly, turning and racing after the thief.

 

 

A SERIES OF SHOTS - THE CHASE

 

The teenager moves off the Promenade onto a bicycle path.

Casanova races after him.

 

Pedestrians move out of the way of the teenager, who is

speeding recklessly on his skateboard and putting distance

between himself and Cassanova.


                                                            6.

 

 

The path begins a broad sweeping turn, and Casanova runs off

the path to cut across in a shortcut.

 

The teenager and Casanova reach a straight-away on the path

at the same time. Casanova tackles the kid, and they both

fall to the ground.

 

The skateboard and Henny's purse go flying. Casanova recovers

first and jumps on the boy.

 

But he wiggles free. He grabs a handful of sand and throws

it in Casanova's face.

 

By the time Casanova recovers, the boy is skating off again.

The purse lies on the ground.

 

Casanova lets him go and picks up the purse.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Casanova presents Henny with her purse.

 

                      HENNY

           Thank you so much.

 

Casanova, exhausted, bows low.

 

Henny's patients are taken by Casanova's costume. They can't

hide their amusement.

 

                      HENNY

           Let me pay you for your trouble.

 

                      CASANOVA

           It is never trouble to come to the

           assistance of a beautiful woman.

 

This is the first time we've heard Casanova talk, and he

speaks a more formal English than natives do. This also is

the last thing Henny expected to hear. She's flustered,

taken off-guard.

 

Henny's patients are beginning to wander off.

 

                      HENNY

           Stay together, people!

 

She gathers them back in, then turns back to Casanova.

 

                      HENNY

           I don't know how to thank you.


                                                            7.

 

 

But while her back was turned, Casanova moved off. She can't

find him in the crowd.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY - LATER

 

Casanova continues down the Prominade.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

                (O.S.)

           Giacomo!

 

Hearing his name, Casanova looks puzzled.

 

CHRISTIANO, 20s, appears. He wears shorts, sandals and a

bright T-shirt, looking like a native.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Giacomo? It's me, Christiano.

 

He pulls Casanova aside, out of the throng of moving people.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Don't you recognize me?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Christiano?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           You look terrible. You just got here,

           didn't you?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Where am I?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           America. It's far beyond Marco Polo's

           wildest dreams!

 

                      CASANOVA

           Why am I speaking English? I don't

           know English.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           You do now. But still thinking in

           Italian, right?

 

Casanova nods, looking very confused.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I can't tell you what a relief it is

           to find someone else from home.


                                                            8.

 

 

                      CASANOVA

           How long have you been here?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           About six months. Remember Lorenzo

           Lebano? I was climbing through his

           daughter's window every night. It was

           so sweet while it lasted. Then I got

           caught, he forced me to drink a magic

           potion -- and here I am!

 

                      CASANOVA

           You and Rosabel?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Don't tell me ... but, of course, it

           makes perfect sense! Sweet Rosabel. I

           missed her for almost a week.

 

                      CASANOVA

           I want to go home.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I'm working on it. In the meantime,

           this is an amazing place, Giacomo,

           you won't believe how people behave

           here. There's so much to tell you, I

           don't know where to begin. You must

           be starving.

 

                      CASANOVA

           I am very hungry.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I found a place that makes wonderful

           pasta. My treat. In a few days, after

           you've had time to adjust, you can

           help me follow some leads.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Leads?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           A couple people we need to talk to.

           We've got to find the magic that will

           get us back.

 

                      CASANOVA

           As soon as possible! I belong in Italy.


                                                            9.

 

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Italy's the easy part. It's getting

           back to our own time that's the bitch.

           Are you ready for this? Here it's the

           twenty-first century.

 

                      CASANOVA

           I belong in 1749, I belong in Venice.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           This is Venice -- California!

 

                      CASANOVA

           I do not understand.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Come on, you'll think more clearly on

           a full stomach.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - PUBLIC REST ROOM - DAY

 

They pass a public restroom.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I gotta pee.

 

Christiano enters and Casanova, hesitating a moment, follows

him.

 

 

INT. PUBLIC REST ROOM - DAY

 

Christiano goes to a urinal. Casanova waits behind, wide-

eyed, not sure what kind of building he's entered.

 

Christiano finally notices Casanova's wonder.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Isn't this incredible?

 

He flushes and zips up.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Wait'll you see this.

 

He opens a door and presents the toilet.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           For the bowels.

 

He flushes it. Casanova stares at the circling water.


                                                           10.

 

 

                      CASANOVA

           Where does it go?

 

Christiano shrugs off the question.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Not in the street! Everyone here is

           obsessed with cleanliness. Come on.

 

He leads the way out. With a final look around in amazement,

Casanova hurries behind him.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - ANGELO'S CAFE - DAY

 

They sit outside at a sidewalk cafe. Casanova is wolfing

down a large plate of pasta like he hasn't eaten in days.

Christiano sips a glass of red wine.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           First, we've got to get you a place

           to stay tonight. And a way to make

           some spare change. You played in the

           orchestra ... if we can get you a

           violin, you'll do fine. You can be a

           street musician. Tonight, anyway, you

           can crash at the shelter, long as we

           get there early enough to reserve you

           a cot. I've been crashing at the

           studio. I've making a movie.

 

                      CASANOVA

           What is that?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           You won't believe your eyes. Movies

           are the best thing here. What I'm

           doing is just a low budget thing --

           it's either erotica or porno,

           depending on whether you're for or

           against it.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Porno?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I get paid for making love to women.

           I don't know how to tell you this,

           but you're in the title. "Casanova

           Does California."

 

                      CASANOVA

           I do not understand.


                                                           11.

 

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           You won't believe the reputation you

           have here. You're considered the

           greatest lover of all time. Listen, I

           may be able to get you a small part.

           Hell, maybe Tom will even let you

           crash at the studio. We'll run by on

           our way to the shelter.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Henny window-shops with her patients. She keeps a close

watch on them.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - BUSINESS AREA - DAY

 

They're away from the beach, walking along a sidewalk in a

business area. Many of the buildings have flashy murals

painted on them.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           The thing is, if you say you're

           Casanova, eventually you'll get

           locked up for being crazy. You can't

           tell the truth here.

 

                      CASANOVA

           I always tell the truth.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I tried to tell the truth in the

           beginning, too, and I ended up in

           jail. I'm still seeing a shrink as

           part of my parole. Believe me, it's

           an experience you want to avoid.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Who am I if I am not who I am?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I'll call you Amado. You're my cousin

           visiting from Venice in the old

           country. Let me do the talking. This

           way.

 

They turn on a side street.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - SIDE STREET - DAY

 

They continue walking. Ahead, a small group of WOMEN are

picketing in front of a windowless, square building.


                                                           12.

 

 

The women carry signs reading things like "Tom Snow

Productions Debases Women!," "No Porno in Venice!," and

"Casanova Does Life Without Parole!"

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Oh shit, they're here again. We'll

           have to use the back entrance.

 

Christiano leads the way into an alley, circling around to

the back of the building.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - OFFICE - DAY

 

TOM SNOW, 50s, sits behind a huge desk. He's a short stocky

man who looks older than he is. His face looks like it's

been hit by an avalanche.

 

Snow's eyes are closed. He is making little groaning sounds.

At first, it's hard to know what he's up to.

 

Then his eyes snap open, his chin drops, the groan becomes

louder and more sustained, and he grimaces. With a final

gasp, he is done.

 

He clears his throat and pushes back his chair. He reaches

down to zip up his fly.

 

Popping up from under the desk is SYLVIA, 20s, his secretary.

 

                      TOM

           Thanks, honey, that was really great.

 

                      SYLVIA

           Thank you, Mr. Snow.

 

                      TOM

           Don't forget to note it on your time

           sheet.

 

                      SYLVIA

           Anything else?

 

                      TOM

           Put on the tape of dailies before you

           go.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - FRONT DESK - DAY

 

Christiano leads Casanova into the office. The front desk is

empty.


                                                           13.

 

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Anybody home!

 

Sylvia quickly appears.

 

                      SYLVIA

           Hi, Chris. You want to see Tom?

 

                      TOM

                (O.S.)

           Chris, get your ass in here!

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - OFFICE - DAY

 

Tom is watching a VIDEO TAPE, where Christiano and Sylvia

are on an ornate bed, in a passionate embrace. Christiano is

dressed like Casanova, in 18th century frills.

 

Christiano and Casanova enter.

 

                      TOM

           This scene sucks. It takes too

           goddamn long for everybody to get

           naked.

 

For the first time he spins away from the TV.

 

                      TOM

           Who's this?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           My cousin, Amado. He's just come over

           from the old country.

 

                      TOM

           How about a drink?

 

Without waiting for an answer, Tom swings his chair around

to the full bar behind him.

 

Casanova can't keep his eyes off the moving images on the TV.

He approaches the set and looks behind it, trying to

understand how it works, where the images come from.

 

Tom notices this.

 

                      TOM

           Something wrong?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Amado, what's the matter, you never

           seen a TV before? Your village isn't

           that primitive!


                                                           14.

 

 

He laughs like crazy and pushes Casanova into a chair.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - OFFICE - DAY - LATER

 

A nearly empty bottle of Scotch is on the desk. Tom has been

holding court.

 

                      TOM

           It's the image, it's always the image!

           Fucking writers never know that. All

           they know is words. Show me a writer

           and I'll show you too many goddamn

           words!

 

Sylvia sticks her head in the doorway.

 

                      SYLVIA

           I'm leaving now, Mr. Snow.

 

                      TOM

           Wait a minute.

 

He leans over the desk and grins.

 

                      TOM

           Amado, you want to get a little head

           before she goes? She's great, trust me.

 

Casanova, not sure what has been asked, shoots a puzzling

look to Christiano.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

                (to change the subject)

           Tom, I forgot to tell you, the

           picketers are outside again.

 

                      TOM

           Goddamn ice queens. Somebody should

           fuck their brains out and give them a

           life.

 

                      SYLVIA

           Maybe I'd better go out the back way.

           If that's all right ...

 

                      TOM

           Amado, you want some?

 

Casanova shrugs, still confused.

 

                      TOM

           Get out of here, honey. See you in

           the morning.


                                                           15.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - BASEMENT - DAY

 

A dark basement. A LIGHT snaps on.

 

Tom leads Christiano and Casanova down a stairway into the

basement. Casanova, taking up the rear, moves with hesitation.

 

 

INT. VENICE, ITALY - STAIRWAY/BASEMENT - DAY (MEMORY FLASH)

 

Casanova's mother waits at the foot of the stairs as the boy

slowly comes down, step by careful step. The basement is

dark, cast in shadows from a lantern.

 

                      CASANOVA'S MOTHER

           Hurry up, Giacomo! You want your nose

           bleeds to stop or not?

 

The boy reaches the bottom. An OLD WOMAN comes forward,

appearing haggard, scary, maybe a gypsy, maybe a witch.

 

                      OLD WOMAN

           Bring the boy this way.

 

Casanova's mother takes his hand, and they follow the old

woman to a seaman's trunk. The old woman raises the lid.

 

                      OLD WOMAN

           Put the boy in the chest.

 

                      CASANOVA

           No, mama!

 

                      CASANOVA'S MOTHER

           Do as she says, Giacomo. This is

           going to stop your nose bleeds.

 

The mother and old woman together get the boy into the trunk.

 

                      OLD WOMAN

           Hold him down.

 

The mother holds him down while the woman sprinkles herbs

over him.

 

                      OLD WOMAN

           Let him go.

 

As soon as the mother's arms are out of the way, the old

woman slams down the lid with Casanova inside.

 

                      CASANOVA'S MOTHER

           How long must he be inside?


                                                           16.

 

 

                      OLD WOMAN

           As long as it takes.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - BASEMENT - DAY (PRESENT)

 

Casanova reaches the bottom of the stairs and comes into the

room.

 

The basement is a movie set. The ornate bed from the dailies

is along a wall, the focus of an array of movie lights.

 

In a corner, a sleeping bag is rolled out over a mattress.

 

                      TOM

           Amado, you got a sleeping bag?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I know where I can borrow one.

 

                      TOM

           It's all yours then.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Really appreciate this, Tom.

 

                      TOM

           I've got to get out of here. It's the

           old lady's birthday.

 

He starts back up the stairs.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           See you in the morning.

 

Tom is gone.

 

                      CASANOVA

           This is where you sleep?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           It's not as bad as it looks. And the

           price is right. Come on, we've got to

           get you a sleeping bag. And a violin.

           And some clothes.

 

 

INT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Christiano and Casanova come out of a sporting goods store.

Casanova is wearing shorts, sandals, a tank top and a

baseball cap. He carries his native clothes in a paper bag.


                                                           17.

 

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Now the violin, the sleeping bag, and

           we're done.

 

                      HENNY

           Hello, Chris.

 

Christiano turns to find Henny and her patients.

 

                      HENNY

                (to Casanova)

           Hello again.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           You know each other?

 

                      HENNY

                (ignoring this)

           Didn't you have an appointment to see

           me this morning?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Did I? God, I can't believe I missed

           it. Did you--

 

                      HENNY

           I haven't told your parole officer.

           Yet. Can I see you in the morning?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I got this job ... but, sure, I can

           work something out. Can we make it

           eight?

 

                      HENNY

           That's a little early, isn't it?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I wouldn't have to miss much work

           that way.

 

                      HENNY

           Eight it is.

 

She turns her focus to Casanova, who is staring at her. In

fact, Casanova appears to be mesmerized by her.

 

Henny offers her hand. Casanova starts shaking it and

doesn't let go.


                                                           18.

 

 

                      HENNY

           I'm Henny Thomas. Thank you again.

                (to Christiano)

           He stopped a thief from stealing my

           purse.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Really?

 

                      HENNY

                (to Casanova)

           You never told me your name.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

                 (quickly)

           This is my cousin Amado  from the old

           country.

 

                      HENNY

           Are you visiting long?

 

Casanova pulls her hand forward, bends down, and kisses it.

A slow gentle kiss that leaves Henny speechless.

 

                      CASANOVA

           You have extraordinary eyes.

 

Christiano pulls Casanova away and starts hurrying off. As

they depart, he talks over his shoulder.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Nice running into you, and I'll be at

           your office at eight! Thanks for not

           reporting me! It won't happen again!

 

Henny looks puzzled, watching them go. She holds up the hand

that was kissed and stares at it.

 

She discovers that her patients have strayed and quickly

gets into gear to round them up.

 

Christiano drags Casanova along.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Forget about getting her purse, she's

           not available.

 

 

EXT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - NIGHT

 

The building is deserted, the picketers long gone. No

visible lights are on.


                                                           19.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - BASEMENT - NIGHT

 

Christiano is sprawled across his sleeping bag, reading a

script, memorizing his lines.

 

A second mattress has been pulled near his. Casanova sits on

a sleeping bag, tuning a violin.

 

With the instrument in tune, Casanova tries it out. He plays

something classical from the 18th century.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Man, you're gonna wow the shit out of

           the tourists. They're not used to

           hearing classical out there.

 

Casanova sets down the violin.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Help me with lines.

 

He tosses Casanova his script.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Scene 43. I'm Casanova, you're Honey

           Buns.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Why are you pretending to be me?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Not the real Casanova, it's my part

           in the picture. I told you, they

           think of you as history's great

           superstud. Scene 43, the first line

           is yours.

 

                      CASANOVA

                (reading)

           "I can suck chrome off a bumper."

           What does this mean?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

                (reciting his lines)

           "You can use my bumper any time, baby.

           I got more hot meat for you than a

           Coney Island chili dog stand."

 

 

EXT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - NIGHT

 

Casanova storms out of the building. A moment later

Christiano comes out.


                                                           20.

 

 

He catches up with him.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Giacomo, you don't get it. It doesn't

           matter if it doesn't make any sense.

           These kind of movies, people watch

           them with the sound off till everybody

           gets naked. Then it's all background

           music and heavy breathing.

 

                      CASANOVA

           What you said is an insult to

           lovemaking!

 

Christiano stops and lets him go.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

                (after him)

           You gonna be able to find your way

           back?

 

No answer.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - NIGHT

 

Casanova walks along the Promenade. It's much less crowded

than during the day.

 

He approaches a restaurant as Henny comes out with TED

MINER, 40s. She recognizes Casanova.

 

                      HENNY

           Amado? Nice to see you again.

 

Casanova also recognizes her and bows low in her honor.

 

                      HENNY

           I'd like you to meet my fiancee, Ted

           Miner.

 

                      TED

           Hello.

 

He offers his hand. Casanova gives only a single shake.

 

                      HENNY

                (to Ted)

           Amado's the one I was telling you

           about. He's visiting from Italy.

 

                      TED

           Rome?


                                                           21.

 

 

                      CASANOVA

           Venice.

 

                      TED

           Which do you prefer, Venice, Italy or

           Venice, California?

 

                      CASANOVA

           I miss my home.

 

                      HENNY

           Already?

                (to Ted)

           He just got here.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Why are you marrying him?

 

                      HENNY

           Excuse me?

 

                      CASANOVA

           He is not the man you should marry.

           It would be a great mistake if you do

           this.

 

                      TED

                (to Henny)

           You sure he isn't one of your patients?

 

                      HENNY

           Well, Amado, it doesn't really matter

           what you think, does it? Have a

           pleasant evening.

 

She grabs Ted's hand and heads off. Casanova watches them

go, growing concern in his gaze.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - STREET - NIGHT

 

Casanova walks along a sidewalk, trying to recognize where

he is. In fact, he is lost.

 

A WOMAN PEDESTRIAN approaches from the other direction.

Seeing Casanova, she crosses the street.

 

He also crosses the street, and they approach one another

again.

 

She crosses back. He crosses back.

 

She takes something out of her purse and stops.


                                                           22.

 

 

                      WOMAN PEDESTRIAN

           I have Mace!

 

He keeps walking toward her.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Excuse me! Can you help me? I am

           terribly lost.

 

                      WOMAN PEDESTRIAN

           What's the address?

 

                      CASANOVA

           I wish I knew.

 

He reaches her.

 

                      CASANOVA

           The name is Tom Snow Productions.

 

                      WOMAN PEDESTRIAN

           Pervert!

 

The woman lets out a sudden screech and sprays him with Mace.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - NIGHT

 

Casanova is at a water fountain, rinsing out his eyes. While

he's still blinded, two TEENAGERS come up to him.

 

                      TEENAGER #1

           Give me your wallet.

 

The second teenager snaps open a switchblade.

 

                      TEENAGER #2

           Now, motherfucker!

 

Casanova still can't see clearly.

 

                      TEENAGER #2

                (to the other)

           Get it!

 

The first teenager grabs for Casanova's wallet. Casanova

grasps his arm, twists it, and drops the boy to the ground.

 

The other teenager jumps on his back but Casanova bends

forward, throwing him to the ground as well.

 

The teenagers have had enough and scramble to their feet,

running off.


                                                           23.

 

 

Casanova rubs his eyes, the Mace still having its effect.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - STREET - NIGHT

 

Henny is cleaning Casanova's face with a damp handkerchief.

Ted leans against his convertible at the curb.

 

                      HENNY

           I'm so glad we passed by and saw you.

           This is such a terrible thing to

           happen on your first night in America.

           Please don't think we're all like

           those hoodlums. How are you doing?

           Feel better?

 

                      CASANOVA

           This feels very nice.

 

                      HENNY

           Good. Can we give you a ride somewhere?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Tom Snow Productions.

 

                      HENNY

           Why does that ring a bell? Do you

           know the address?

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PAY PHONE - NIGHT

 

The convertible is parked near a pay phone. Ted is looking

in the yellow pages.

 

                      TED

           Got it.

 

 

EXT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - NIGHT

 

The convertible pulls up in front of the dark building.

 

 

INT. CONVERTIBLE - NIGHT

 

Casanova sits alone in back. Henny swings around to face him.

 

                      HENNY

           Is anybody here?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Christiano and I sleep in the basement.


                                                           24.

 

 

                      HENNY

           I thought he was staying at a halfway

           house. Interesting.

 

Casanova gets out.

 

 

EXT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - CONVERTIBLE - NIGHT

 

He goes to Henny's side. He offers his hand. When she offers

hers, he bends low and kisses it again.

 

                      TED

           Amado, how do you like California so

           far?

 

                      CASANOVA

                (reciting a poem)

           "Midway in our life's journey, I went

           astray / from the straight road and

           woke to find myself / alone in a dark

           wood. How shall I say // what wood

           that was! I never saw so dreary, / so

           rank, so arduous a wilderness! / Its

           very memory gives a shape to fear."

 

He stops and glares at Ted.

 

                      HENNY

           Is that something you wrote?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Alighieri wrote it.

 

                      HENNY

           I don't know him.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Dante Alighieri is our best  poet.

 

                      HENNY

           Oh, Dante! I didn't realize he was

           world-famous by his first name! Did

           you know that, Ted?

 

Ted has had enough of this nonsense and puts the car in

gear, laying rubber to get away from there.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - BASEMENT - NIGHT

 

Casanova comes downstairs. Christiano has fallen asleep

while reading.


                                                           25.

 

 

Casanova turns out the light next to Christiano. He crawls

into his own sleeping bag and gets comfortable.

 

He looks at the ceiling, thinking.

 

 

INT. VENICE, ITALY - BASEMENT - DAY (MEMORY FLASH)

 

The old woman opens the seaman's trunk. Casanova's mother

watches.

 

Even though there is only lantern light in the basement, the

young Casanova squints, blinded. He sits up.

 

                      OLD WOMAN

           No nose bleed.

 

                      CASANOVA'S MOTHER

           Is he cured?

 

                      OLD WOMAN

           We'll have to wait and see.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY (PRESENT)

 

Christiano helps Casanova get settled at a spot along the

Promenade.

 

Outside a shop nearby, the OWNER is sweeping. He stops to

watch with curiosity as Casanova, wearing his new beach

attire, gets ready to play the violin.

 

Christiano arranges the open violin case, then takes out a

dollar and drops it in.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Seed money. I'll see my shrink, go to

           work and when we're done shooting,

           I'll come by to see how you're making

           out. You gonna be all right?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Such a beautiful day! I will play

           beautiful music.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           That's the spirit.

 

Christiano heads out. Before he's far, Casanova begins a

classical piece. Christiano grins.

 

People along the Promenade gather to watch Casanova.


                                                           26.

 

 

A nearby street performer, a SWORD SWALLOWER, watches his

audience disperse to listen to the beautiful violin music.

 

 

INT. HENNY'S OFFICE - DAY

 

Christiano sits across the desk from Henny.

 

                      HENNY

           I ran into Amado last night.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Really?

 

                      HENNY

           He says he's staying with you -- but

           not at the halfway house. We dropped

           him off.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           It's just temporary, for convenience.

           It's where my job is and we like to

           start early in the morning.

 

                      HENNY

           You haven't told me about this job.

           What is it?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           It's, ah, you know, an acting job.

 

                      HENNY

           Acting! I didn't know you were an

           actor.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Just a small role, you know, nothing

           very important.

 

                      HENNY

           A film or a play or ... ?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           No, it's, ah, you know, an

           instructional video.

 

                      HENNY

           Very good.

 

 

INT. HENNY'S OFFICE - FRONT DESK - DAY

 

Henny walks Christiano out of the office.


                                                           27.

 

 

                      HENNY

           Are you showing Amado the sights?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I left him playing the violin on

           Ocean Front.

 

                      HENNY

           He's a street musician?

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Gives him something to do while I'm

           working.

 

                      HENNY

           Interesting.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Casanova plays the violin. Quite a crowd has gathered to

listen.

 

The nearby Sword Swallower glares at the new competition. He

packs up and moves on in disgust.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - BASEMENT - DAY

 

Tom stands next to the ornate bed, where Christiano and

Sylvia are nude under flimsy "between takes" robes. A camera

is behind him, and bright lights glare down on the bed.

 

                      TOM

           The sequence is, you do a sixty-nine,

           then you sit up on top of him, facing

           the camera, and you reach around and

           grab her tits. I want lots of

           squealing.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Casanova plays the violin. The crowd is even larger. In it

is Henny.

 

Great applause when Casanova finishes. Many people move

forward to drop change or bills into the violin case.

 

Casanova is about to begin another piece when he notices

Henny, who has moved to the front of the line.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Hello!


                                                           28.

 

 

                      HENNY

           Hi. Can I buy you lunch when you take

           a break?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Look how well I am doing! Let me buy

           you lunch.

 

                      HENNY

           In about an hour?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Good.

 

                      HENNY

           Go straight down the Promenade and on

           the left you'll run into Cupid's

           Retreat.

 

                      CASANOVA

           A good name!

 

He begins playing a passionate, gypsy-sounding piece.

 

 

EXT. CUPID'S RETREAT - PATIO - DAY

 

Casanova finds Henny at a table. He hurries over, bows low

and sits.

 

                      CASANOVA

           I feel like I met you in a previous

           life.

 

                      HENNY

           Really?

 

                      CASANOVA

           Your soul feels so familiar to me.

 

                      HENNY

           And if I don't believe in previous

           lives?

 

                      CASANOVA

           But I am living proof that they exist.

 

                      HENNY

           How's that?

 

He scoots his chair closer to her.


                                                           29.

 

 

                      CASANOVA

           My name is not Amado. I am Giacomo

           Casanova. The day before yesterday,

           by my senses, I was forced to drink a

           magic potion on a summer night in

           Venice, Italy, in 1749. When I came

           to, I was on the beach here, and

           Christiano tells me this is the

           twenty-first century!

 

Henny narrows her gaze at him.

 

                      CASANOVA

           I think we met in 1749. I feel like I

           know you.

 

                      HENNY

           A street musician, a weaver of tall

           tales -- you have many talents.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Do you believe me?

 

                      HENNY

           Of course I don't believe you.

 

She laughs.

 

                      HENNY

           You also butt into matters that don't

           concern you. Ted was very upset by

           your remark last night. I wouldn't

           marry him if he wasn't the right man.

 

                      CASANOVA

           No, you are making a terrible mistake!

 

                      HENNY

           Amado--

 

                      CASANOVA

           Casanova.

 

                      HENNY

           Amado--

 

                      CASANOVA

           Casanova!

 

A WAITER appears.

 

                      WAITER

           Are you ready to order?


                                                           30.

 

 

Henny stands up.

 

                      HENNY

           I'm sorry. I'm not as hungry as I

           thought I was.

 

She marches away. Casanova is not sure what to do under the

circumstances.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Then I am not hungry either. Am I

           supposed to pay you for your trouble?

 

                      WAITER

           If you like.

 

Casanova tips him far too much and takes off after Henny.

The waiter shakes his head and grins.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Casanova catches up with Henny.

 

                      CASANOVA

           Why are you upset?

 

                      HENNY

           I don't like to be played for a

           sucker. Amado!

 

                      CASANOVA

           If it makes you feel better, you can

           call me Amado.

 

                      HENNY

           How noble of you.

 

                      CASANOVA

           You must still be hungry. We can go

           somewhere else.

 

She stops and stares at him.

 

                      HENNY

           No! I made a mistake coming here to

           see you. I don't know what I was

           thinking. I want you to stop following

           me.

 

Henny is quickly gone, and Casanova is crushed.

 

He turns to find a JUGGLER controlling three chain saws in

the air.


                                                           31.

 

 

Someone hands him a flier that says, "Lose 30 pounds in 30

days!"

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY - LATER

 

Casanova plays a classical tear-jerker on the violin.  He

really gets into it, tears welling in his eyes.

 

 

INT. VENICE, ITALY - DRAWING ROOM - DAY (MEMORY FLASH)

 

The young Casanova is playing the same melody on a smaller

violin, giving a concert in a drawing room.

 

A guest whispers to Casanova's mother.

 

                      GUEST

           He has so much talent. How is his

           health?

 

                      CASANOVA'S MOTHER

           No nose bleeds in over a year.

 

 

INT. TOM SNOW PRODUCTIONS - BASEMENT - DAY (PRESENT)

 

Tom films the sex action on the bed. Both Christiano and

Sylvia are trying far too hard to sound passionate with

gasps and grunts and groans.

 

But Tom loves it and gives them a thumbs up.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - PROMENADE - DAY

 

Christiano steps forward at the end of a song. He is taken

aback by all the money in the violin case.

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           Look at this! You do this well every

           day and I'm taking lessons from you.

 

 

EXT. VENICE - BEACH - DAY

 

Casanova and Christiano walk along the beach, eating hot

dogs. Casanova still has trouble keeping his eyes off the

near-bare female bodies everywhere, but he looks more

shocked than seduced by them.


                                                           32.

 

 

                      CHRISTIANO

           I got a lead on a dude named Larry