There are several stages of abuse and depending upon which stage a you are in, you will need different forms of help. The links below will provide information about each stage as well as contact information for resources in Chapel Hill and Carrboro. By clicking on the statements below, you will find resources to help you decide what to do next.
- I think my partner may be abusing me, but I'm not sure.
- I know my partner is abusing me but I'm not sure what to do next.
I think I want to leave my partner but I'm not sure how.
The main thing to remember with leaving your partner is that you should plan out your steps. If you can, secure housing with friends or family members; if that is not an option, you can find temporary housing at a local shelter for women. You should also leave when you know your partner will be gone for a significant amount of time, such as when he is going to work. You should also take all of the money you can find and gather any necessary legal documents: your birth certificate, driver.s license, social security card, as well as these documents for your children. Once you do leave, let the police know so you can file a Personalized Protection Order to keep you and your children safe. Also, file for temporary custody of your children with the police as soon as possible to protect them from your partner.
Once you are in a safe place, you should seek medical attention if needed. You can go to UNC Hospital or the Inter-Faith Council; Inter-Faith has a free medical clinic.
Finally, if you have time to develop a plan to leave, look at question 5. It will detail everything you need to gather. Remember, you cannot control your partner.s abusive behavior; you can control your response to the abuse. Protect yourself and your children.
Click here for resources that can help you learn what to do in order to leave your partner.
- I think I am in danger and I need to leave NOW.
- I would like to leave my partner and I want to plan it out.
- I have left my partner but I still need help.