Subject: Stupid Human Tricks

From: "John W. Hall" <[email-masked]>
Date: Fri, 8 Sep 95 20:17:12 -0300

To prove that all trades deal with hazardous materials, my 
sister-in-law sends this anecdote about her husband, the chef:
        
The cheese cutting has nothing to do with metalworking,unfortunately.  
He literally cut himself _on the cheese_.  At the John B., they grate 
their own parmesan, which has quite a stiff rind - it fell, Kevin 
grabbed for it, and cut himself rather badly.  I'm sure this will be a 
part of their kitchen legends for years to come.  "Remember that guy 
who cut himself on the CHEESE?"

John

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From: [email-masked] (john haskey)
Date: Fri, 8 Sep 1995 22:58:22 GMT

In article <[email-masked]>,
MENielsen <[email-masked]> wrote:
>Good to see the bricklayer story has now passed into urban legend. It used
>to be retold by the English cartoonist Gerard Hofnung. There is a
>recording of it on an old BBC record. He embelishes it and the whole thing
>is very funny. Hofnung organized gatherings of professional musicians in
>the 50's who played pieces written for garden hoses, hoovers, etc.

It's also been retold as a sailor's lament, about painting the mast, holding
on to a halyard, conterbalanced by a bucket of water (?) etc...

								---john.

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[email-masked]

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From: [email-masked]
Date: 9 Sep 1995 04:46:50 GMT

>   [email-masked] (Edward Haas) writes:
>  What felt *really* odd was when 
>  the doctor tried to pull the chip out and my eye wanted to come along for 
>  the ride... Got it out, all is well, but now I wear REAL safety glasses 
>  with top and side protection.  

Try letting a ferrous metal sliver rust in your eye. It has to be ground out with
a sort of low speed Dremel and what looks like a wood carving bit. What's hard
to take, is you can see each cutting edge as it sweeps past the cornea, and it 
looks like the cutter is the size of a watermelon.

Jon, who's been there, at least a dozen times to many....

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From: [email-masked] (Jerry Long)
Date: Mon, 11 Sep 1995 14:24:45 GMT

Okay, I'll bite....

When I was in college, I worked in the cafeteria after hours
to pay off my tuition ( you know - baseball wanna be, and outa' money).
One of the chores I had to perform was to clean the tile floors in the
cooking areas. The machine used to do this was much like the rentable
rug shampoo'ers you see in the grocery store but had a VERY high pressure
nozzle which emitted a low volume spray. 

So here I am on my solo flight of the power jet washer. I hook the input 
up to the hot water spicket and away I go. However, the grease-filled 
grout between the floor tiles don't appear to be getting very clean.
Oh, I get it, the water coming out of the spray nozzle must not be 
hot yet. Lets just put my thumb over the end and see how hot it is...

YOWZERS!!!           

The water pressure broke the skin and created a nice 3/8ths inch blister
filled with hot - detergent water!!      

Let me tell you right now - this puppy stings.

After I stopped dancing around the room in agony, the sup. said "oh, by the
way, don't put your fingers over the nozzle!"