Sri:
SrimatE Gopaladesika MahadesikAya Namaha,
Translation by U.Ve. Dr. V.N. Vedanta Desikan Swamin:
963. kim vA BhaviShyathi param kaluShaIkavrutthE
rEthAvathApyanupajAthamanEhasA mE
Ekam thadhasthi yadhi pashyasi pAdhukE! thE
PadhmAsahAyapadhapankajaBhOgasAmyam
Oh Paaduka! If You throw Your glance one me, I will be granted an
equality with You in the enjoyment of the bliss of the Lord's Lotus
Feet. Only that remains yet for me to experience. Because I have
reaped all others by my continuous engagement with sins (Any good
deed now and then has given me chances of small rewards too).
Only this remains: the bliss of communion with the Lord's Feet on
par with You!
Namo Narayana,
SriMuralidhara Dasan
Special Notes by V.Sadagopan (V.S):
1) UtthamUr Swamy's anubhavam: Oh PaadhukE ! What else
is going to happen anymore to me , who commits sins almost as
an occupation ? There is only one thing that can happen to me
through Your blessings . That is to become equal to You in enjoying
the experience of serving Your Lord's feet . May thou bless me to
reach a status similar to Yours ! I have enjoyed every thing else
and found them useless.
2) SrImath Andavan's anubhavam : Oh PaadhukE ! Committing sins
is my profession ( Thozhil/Vrutthi) . There is not a paapam that I
have not acquired . There is no end to the narakams that I am
destined to experience . How can I then dream of being blessed with
Bhagavath anubhavam under these adverse circumstances ? Oh PadhukE !
If You decide that I will correct myself over time and come out of
my miseries , I will continue to rot in SamsAram. I will never ever
seek or attain MOksha Sukham . If You decide however to take pity
on me and come to my rescue , then the divine glances of the Lord and
His PirAtti will fall one me and I will be saved from the
debilitating samsAra ruchi . I will gain ParipoorNAnubhavam of Your
Lord. The fact that You do not pay attention to my sufferings is
solely due to my accumulated sins . Swamy Desikan expresses his
nirvEdham this way .
3) Oh PaadhukE ! I have the occupation of commiting sins
perpetually ( kalushaika vrutthE: mE ). Until all these days
( yEthAvathA anEhasApi ) , I have not been the recipient of
Your mercy and the consequent boons ( anupajAtham param
kim vaa? ) . If Your merciful glances fall on me ( Yadhi pasyasi) ,
I will gain a blessed status equal to You in enjoying the glories of
Your Lord's Thiruvadi ( yadhi pasyasi tE PadhmA SahAya Padha
pankaja bhOga saamyam tath yEkam asthi)...(V.S).
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