SrI:
Dear Srimathy Radha Parthasarathy :
This can be done.
There are however all kinds of hang ups
.
Let me list a few .
There are poor parents of girls from great vamsams
,
who can not come up with the dowry demanded .
Instead of
looking for the girl's kulam , intelligence
,
educational accomplishments and compatability
,
the parents of the boy are very demanding .
Our potential grooms inspite of their education
and positions do not show much independent thinking
and make the wife's life miserable . The Mother in Laws
of girls should welcome the brides and not compete
with them for the sons' demonstration of
loyalty and affection . The parents should
encourage the sons to grow up emotionally .
Today's girls or their parents also drive hard bargains .
They do not have much respect for their traditional
values . They are economically secure and
price themselves out of the market .
There are plenty of matrimonial sites but in reality
they are poorly managed and are assembly of
antiquated records .
The cruelty of Blaming girls born under Moolam
and boys with Aayilyam etc and condemning them
to the back heap are not bright ways of going about
addressing the apt matching . After all , there are
27 stars .One has to be born under one or the other .
The best would be to perform Prapatti and
acknowledge that
the grahams have no power over a Prapannan and
marry
a girl from a good kulam , not seek dowry and make
sure
that the boys and girls are from different gotrams
.
If some one who is a web Master can help me
set up a special site to list prospects ( Brides and
bridegrooms ) , who will not see the world thru
the color glasses of dowry , I can mange this site
with the help of a few well wishers and try to help .
V.Sadagopan
NamO SrI NrusimAa ,
P.S : I know of a beautiful VaishNavite girl from
a good Kulam and large family ( 3 children) ,
whose
father has midlevel Manager's job . The girl has
graduated from the of the top Institutes of
Finanace
and Management and has a good job . The
parents
are sending the son to an overseas institution to
get
an advanced degree . The parents can hardly
afford
a major dowry . A Joyous celebration of
marriage
with appropriate groom for this girl
without dhadapudal
( Pomp ) at a Temple or Sri Matam and private
reception
would eb the best way to go to start their lives
supporting each other and respecting their parents
.
__._,_.___ Oppiliappan Koil Varadachari Sadagopan http://www.sadagopan.org
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